Use Bombs

Ah, the holidays. A time of the year set aside for love, joy, and peace. A festive time of filled with lights and decoration.

You’ve spent hours of effort creating Yule-time joy and crafting holiday cheer. Yet, as with anything, what goes up must come down. And, as we all know, taking those decorations down can be a lot of work.

Now there’s a better way! Now there’s a way to dedecorate your home in minutes instead of weeks. Enter the Dodedecotron 350 and it’s older sibling the Dodedecotron 350XL. Cleaning up after the holidays will never be the same again!

Do you have gift wrap on the floor? Garland hanging from the ceiling? Lights strung up across to the roof? A mother-in-law visiting for the season? Pesky raccoons living in the garbage? Nothing is outside the realm of spotlessness created by the Dodedecotron 350′s awesome explosive wrath.

With simple patented Pull N’ Throw™ technology, the Dodedecotron eliminates the need for soaking, scrubbing, bubbling, sanitizing, and cannibalizing. This Saves you time, energy, and money!

And, the Dodedecotron can make you the hero of your neighborhood! As a matter of fact, using the 45 kiloton Dodedecotron 350XL a single person—with a team of six dedicated explosive and Dodedecotron specialists—could theoretically dedecorate several square miles at a time.

Am I not convincing enough? Users love the Dodedecotron! Just listen to what they have to say about it.

“I listen to Paul Harvey News! When I heard that the Dodedecotron 350 could cut my dedecoration costs by up to 50%, I was so eager that I bought two!”

— Steven Little, MO

“The Dodedecotron is a life saver. Not only did it get rid of my Hanukkah decorations, but it creates a warm, healthy heat. That cuts down on my gas bill!”

— Beverly Simpson, ON, Canada

“I just ordered my first Dodedecotron. Honestly, I’m more excited about taking the decorations down this year than I am about putting them up.”

— Jonathan Wright, 1978-2006

“United States. Infidels. Dodedecotron—Always Fun.”

— Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

Einstein said of the Dodedecotrons 350XL’s predecessor, “The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.” Einstein! You don’t get much better than an Einstein quote!

Stay tuned for important information about ordering your Dodedecotron or Dodedecotron 350XL.

Use as directed. Use-Bombs is not responsible for any injury, maiming, disfigurement, or death caused by the Dodedecotron. Dodedecotron has been known to cause permanent damage or a painful hammock effect in some users. Dodedecotron 350XL has been known to cause nuclear winter when used improperly. Use of the Dodedecotron in your area may be disallowed by local laws or international treaties. Additional fees may apply for international orders.